I was thinking the other day about what it meant to be a fairy.
I lost myself for a long time. I was so concerned with being what other people needed me to be. I was sad, lonely with the company I was with. Money was more important. Everything was a grueling competition. I never spent time outside anymore. The magic and joy I used to get out of daily life was gone.
The magic hit me again very hard this summer. I was with a close group of friends one night, playing, being goofy, watching the falling stars and celebrating. The twinkle lights were glowing between the jungle-like foliage. Every one was laughing. Fireworks were being sent off. The salty pool was nice and warm. I forgot what it felt like to be at complete ease with myself. Every sense felt heightened, and most importantly it felt good.
It made me realize, that feeling like a fairy goes beyond feeling close to nature and believing in magic. It’s about self-acceptance and love. It’s about free will and owning yourself and your choices.
A phrase that seems to keep showing itself in every book I pick up or movie I watch. And something I have personally been working on since I moved home from college.
And even though I’ve been working 3 part time jobs, living with the parents and trying to figure out where the heck my life is headed, I’ve been so happy. I know who I am and I don’t care who doesn’t like it.
I am a fairy, and no one is going to take that away from me again.
Photography by Katie Sivits, Allison Duke, Kesler Tran, (can’t find original photo or photograher, help?) The Lazy Pineapple